In my entire life there have only been two people who have properly hurt me.
A lot of people have caused damage, upset me, made me angry, or disappointed me.. But i’m talking about real, significant, lasting pain. The kind of pain you can’t just leave to evaporate, this pain needs proactive work to shed.
The latter of those two is a person who gave up on me, just gave up and walked away.
I never heard from that person again, and for all i knew death had occurred. Of course i could’ve found out, but i didn’t. I didn’t really want to face it, better to have a shield of uncertainty +3 to protect me, and it has.
Till about ten minutes ago, when i saw a familiar name arrive in the top left corner of my monitor. Just text on a screen. Just 13 point antialiased LucidaGrand. Just pixels on a screen that caused my jaw to drop a little, the way you read about in books but never truly believe happens in real life. By the time i could mouse over my hidden contact list window, that name was gone.
Not dead. Just hiding.
And that kind of sucks because really, i’m not that scary.
Tags: friend, me
